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June 24, 2011

a few days ago, i read this post on Ray Ortlund’s blog:

“Having some time today I set myself to pray more, confessing sin, asking, thanking and praising.  I am ashamed of my shallowness in knowledge, feeling and desire.  Most humbling.  On the other hand, how astonishing has been the Lord’s kindness to me, mercies like waves of the sea, bright mercies like the stars of heaven, mercies to my soul, mercies to me a sinner in every possible way, crowned with the unspeakable kindness of putting me into the ministry and using me to win souls.  I long more and more to be ‘filled’ with the Spirit.”-Andrew A. Bonar, Diary and Letters (London, 1894), page 333.

immediately after reading this, i felt a strong conviction to spend time in prayer. that hardly ever happens to me. i was home alone, so i had the opportunity to literally talk to God. i was surprised to find an abundance of things to be in prayer for. i prayed for myself, for forgiveness, for friends and things they had asked for prayer for and for young life, camp and all the girls that i know from mariemont. there was a lot more, but it is difficult to recall now.

i have never felt so empowered through prayer. it was an amazing feeling. and for the first time in my life, i found myself in prayer for over an hour. i can never think of a time that i have done that. especially on my own. it was so freeing and i felt so revived afterwards. God is pretty cool like that.

i have never had a strong prayer life, but lately i have felt God moving in my heart. it was very cool the other night. my friend was struggling with his relationship with his father, and God really laid it on my heart in prayer that i should write a letter to him. so, at two o’clock in the morning, there i sat, writing a letter that was clearly not my hand, but God’s. i really have no clue what i wrote, i just wrote. and when i finished, i sealed the envelope and waited for the opportunity to turn it over. when i saw him next, i gave it to him.

later that night, i got a phone call. he had read my letter and was calling to say thanks. and to tell me that he had the first real conversation with his father in 6 years. how insane is that? it was such an amazing feeling to feel God using me to relay His message to someone else. i don’t know if that’s ever actually happened to me before. but it was incredible. and i pray that the opportunity arises again.

i am excited that i am excited about prayer. it’s always been a little tough for me to really feel connected to God in prayer, and i feel like-finally-i am getting it. and it feels amazing.

One Comment leave one →
  1. June 27, 2011 6:45 pm

    awesome!!! Praise God, that’s great, thanks for sharing, Kait!! 🙂

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